FamilyLifeEducation
10.1ConceptsofFamilyLifeEducation10.1.1FamilyandHousehold
Thefamilymaybebroadlydefinedasaunitoftwoormorepersonsunitedbytiesofmarriage,blood,adoptionorconsensualunions,generallyconstitutingasinglehousehold,andinteractingandcommunicatingwitheachother(Desai1994).Everyindividualhasafamilyoforientationorfamilyoforiginasitisthefamilyhe/sheisborninto.Mostindividualsalsoformafamilyofprocreation,mostlybymarriageandchildbearingbutmaybealsobyconsensualrelationships,reproductivetech-nologiesoradoption(Collinsetal.2007).Familyandhouseholdare,often,usedsynonymously.However,ahouseholdmeansaresidentialunit,composedofoneormorepersonslivingunderthesameroofandeatingfoodcookedinasinglekitchen(Shah1973)andmayormaynotcompriseafamily.
10.1.2FamilyintheEcologicalPerspective
Theecologicalperspectiveviewsanindividualinthecontextofhis/herfamilyandthefamilyinthecontextofitsenvironmentastheseconstantlyinteractwithand,therefore,influenceoneanother.Thefamily’simmediateenvironmentiscom-prisedoftheethnic/kinshipcommunity,neighbourhood,naturalenvironment,workplace,school/college,friends,mediaandsoon.Thestate,corporatesectorandthemarketinfluencethefamilyindirectly.Themacro-systemisthelargerinter-nationaleco-politicalcontextsinwhichthesesystemsareembedded.Diversityintheenvironmentbringsvariationsinfamilylife,which,inturn,explainsdiffer-encesinindividualmembers’well-beingtoalargeextent.Similarly,changesintheenvironmentinfluencethefamilylife,whichaffectsitsindividualmembers(Desai1994).
M.Desai,ARights-BasedPreventativeApproachforPsychosocialWell-BeinginChildhood,Children’sWell-Being:IndicatorsandResearch3,
CSpringerScience+BusinessMediaB.V.2010DOI10.1007/978-90-481-9066-9_10,
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10.1.3TypesofFamilies
Familiesareclassifiedasfollowsbasedontheclassificationofgroupsbyperfor-mancegivenbyJohnsonandJohnson(2009):
1.Pseudo-families:Pseudo-familiesarefamilieswhosemembershavenointerestinoneanother.Althoughtheytalktooneanother,theyseeoneanotherasrivalswhomustbedefeated.Asaresult,thesumofthewholeislessthanthesumofthepotentialoftheindividualmembers.Thememberswouldbehappierstayingalone.
2.Traditionalfamilies:Traditionalfamiliesarestructuredinsuchawaythatverylittlejointworkisrequired.Somemembersseekafreerideontheeffortsofthemoreconscientiousmembers.Thelattermayfeelexploitedanddolessorwouldbehappierifstayingalone.
3.Effectivefamilies:Aneffectivefamilyismorethanthesumofitspartsasthememberscommitthemselvestomaximisingtheirownandothers’poten-tials.Thecharacteristicsofeffectivefamiliesarepositiveinterdependence,two-waycommunication,distributedleadership,powerbasedonexpertiseandconstructiveresolutionofconflicts.
10.1.4FamilyLifeEducation
Familylifeeducation(FLE)programmesaimattheachievementofthecharac-teristicsofeffectivefamiliesorfamilywell-being.FollowingaretheprinciplesofFLE:
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FLEisrelevanttoindividuals,couples,andfamiliesacrossthelifespan.FLEdrawsonmultidisciplinaryknowledge.
FLEisofferedinmanyvenues,includingcommunityworkshops,videoandprintmedia,publications,theInternetandsoon.
FLEiseducationalratherthantherapeutic(adaptedfromArcusetal.1993,citedbyDuncanandGoddard2005).
10.2EnrichmentofFamilyDynamics
Familydynamicsiscomprisedoffamilyidentityandesteem,composition,familydevelopmentandfamilyrelationships.
10.2.1FamilyIdentity
10.2.1.1Group-LevelFamilyIdentity
Everyfamilyisconnectedtoitsimmediateenvironmentthatiscomprisedoftheethnic/kinshipcommunity,neighbourhood,naturalenvironment,workplace,
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school/college,friends,publicservices,mediaandsoon(Desai1994).Familyidentityistheboundarythatseparatesitfromothersystemsintheenviron-ment.Itisformedbyitscomposition,ethnicbackgroundandfinancialstatus.Ethnicbackgroundincludesrace,religion,regionalbackgroundandmothertongue.Familynameisoftenanindicatorofthegroup-levelfamilyidentitythatprovidesconnectednesstothefamily.
10.2.1.2Unique-LevelFamilyIdentity
Everyfamilyhasitsownuniquecharacterdependingonitshistory.
10.2.2FamilyComposition
Asasocialsystem,afamilyiscomprisedofsub-systems.Eachmembercanbeconsideredasub-systemanditsdyadalsocanbeconsideredasub-system.Thedyadicsub-systemsare
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Conjugalsub-systemsFilialsub-systemsFraternalsub-systems
Grandparent–grandchildsub-systemsIn-lawsub-systems
Consensualsub-systems
Thefamilycompositioniscomprisedofitssize,ageandsexofitsmembersandrelationshipamongthem.Familieshavepluralityofcompositionthatvarieswithclass,ethnicity,geographicallocationandindividualchoice.Thenormativeortra-ditionalfamilycompositionscompriseofjointandnuclearfamilies.Thejointfamilycomprisestwoormorecouplesandtheirchildren,boundtogetherbycommonmov-ableorimmovableproperty,andmayormaynotbestayingtogether.Variationsinajointfamilyarelinealjointfamilies,collateraljointfamiliesandlineal-cum-collateraljointfamilies.Thenuclearfamilycomprisescouplesandtheirunmarriedchildren,andisgenerallyfinanciallyindependentofotherfamilies.Avariationofanelementary/nuclearfamilyisthesupplementednuclearfamily,whichcomprisesanuclearfamilywithsinglerelatives(Kolenda1987).LeslieandKorman(1984)termedextendedfamiliesasconsanguineousfamiliesastheyfocusonbloodrela-tions.Theytermednuclearfamiliesasconjugalfamiliesasconjugalrelationisthecoreofthesefamilies.
Asmarriageandchildrenareconsideredessentialelementsofatraditionalfamily,thefollowingcomprisealternatefamilycompositions:
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Single-parentfamilies(duetounwedparenthood,deathofaspouse,desertion,separationordivorceormigrationofaspouse)
Childlessfamilies(duetoinfertilityoroutofchoice)
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Reconstituted/step-familyConsensualunions
10.2.3FamilyDevelopment
Asafamilysystemmovesthroughtime,itgoesthroughchangesinitscomposition,asmembersareadded,matureandlost.10.2.3.1StagesofFamilyDevelopment
Thedevelopmentstagesinatraditionalnuclearfamilymaymovethroughthefol-lowingstages,withvariationsinthestagesdependingonthevariationsinageandlifetransitionsoffamilymembers:
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Youngpersonsgettingmarried
Youngcouplesbearingandbringingupchildren
Middle-agedcoupleswithchildrenformingtheirownnuclearfamiliesOldcoupleswithchildrenbearingandbringinguptheirchildren
10.2.3.2FamilyDevelopmentalTasks
Afamily’sdevelopmentaltaskisagrowthresponsibilitythatarisesatacertainstageinthelifeofafamily,determinedbytheageanddevelopmentalneedsofthemembersofthefamily.Successfulachievementofthedevelopmentaltasksleadstosatisfactionandsuccesswithlatertasks,whilefailureleadstounhappinessinthefamily,disapprovalbysocietyanddifficultywithlaterdevelopmentaltasks(Duvall1977).
10.2.3.3FamilyDevelopmentalTransitions
Familydevelopmentaltransitionsmeanfamiliesmovingfromonedevelopmentalstagetoanother.ExamplesoffamilydevelopmentaltransitionsnecessaryateachstageareadaptedasfollowsfromCarterandMcGoldrick(2005):
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Movingtothestageofacouplegettingmarried,thefamilyhasto(1)makecommitmenttoanewdyadicsub-system(conjugal),(2)realignwiththeothersub-systemsinthefamily(filialandfraternal)andwithfriendsand(3)makespaceforthein-lawsub-system.
Movingtothestageofacouplerearingchildren,thefamilyhasto(1)makereadjustmentsintheconjugalsub-systemto(2)makespaceforanewparentingsub-systemwiththeirchildrenand(3)makereadjustmentsintheirfilialsystemtomakespacefortheirparents’grandparentalsub-system.
Movingtothestageofacouplewithadolescentchildren,thefamilyhasto(1)makereadjustmentsintheirparentingsub-systemtoallowtheadolescentchildrenmoreindependence,(2)refocusontheirconjugalsub-systemandcareer
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and(3)makereadjustmentsintheirfilialsystemaccommodatingforcaregivingofandlosingageingparents.
Movingtothestageofanelderlycouple,thefamilyhasto(1)makereadjustmenttoalifeofadependentand(2)readjustmenttolifewithlosingthespouseandsiblingsandpreparationofdeath.
10.2.3.4FamilyAdaptability
Familydevelopmentaltransitionsrequiretheabilityofafamilysystemtoadapttothenewdemandsthatcreatestresswithreferencetotheresourcesavailable.Covertlyorovertly,thefamilytriestomaintainorrestorethebalancebetweendemandsandresources(TsengandHsu1991).Patterson(1988)haslisteddifferentwaysinwhichthiscanbeaccomplishedbythefamilysystem:
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Directactiontoreducethenumberand/orintensityofdemands;
Directactiontoacquireadditionalresourcesnotalreadyavailabletothefamily;Maintainingexistingresourcessothattheycanbeallocatedandreallocatedtomeetchangingdemands;
Managingthetensionassociatedwithcontinuingstrainonresources;and
Cognitiveappraisaltochangethemeaningofasituationtomakeitmoremanageable.
TsengandHsu(1991)alsoidentifiedpromotingchangesinfamilystructureandinteractionthatgivethefamilymorestrength;andskillsfordealingwithstrainanddemandseffectively.
Thefourlevelsofadaptabilityrangefromrigid(verylow),tostructured(lowtomoderate),toflexible(moderatetohigh),tochaotic(veryhigh).Itishypothesisedthatthecentrallevelsofadaptability(structuredandflexible)aremoreconducivetomaritalandfamilyfunctioningwiththeextremes(rigidandchaotic)beingthemostproblematic(Olson1988).Structuredandflexibleadaptabilitythereforefacilitatesfamilydevelopmentaltransitions.
10.2.4FamilyRelationships
Thefollowingskillsofinterpersonalrelationshipscanbeappliedtothefamilysub-systemsaswellasfamilyasasystemforenrichmentoffamilyrelationships:
Semi-openboundaryinrelationships
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CohesionAdaptability
Positiveperceptionofothers
EgalitarianperceptionRecognitionofstrengthsAcceptanceandrespectCelebrationofdifferences
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Positivefeelingsforothers
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WarmthHumilityEmpathy
Win-Wingoalsinrelationships
CollaborativeconflictmanagementskillsInterpersonalcommunicationskills
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OpencommunicationskillsBodylanguageskillsSensitivelisteningskillsFeedbackskills.
10.2.5FamilyActivities
Familyactivitiesincludesharingfamilytasks,havingmealstogether,spendingweekendsandvacations,andcelebratingbirthdaysandfestivals,anddecision-makingaboutthese.AccordingtoKhavariandKhavari(19),wheneverpossible,theentirefamilyshouldreadanddiscusstheideasandinformationtogether.Inthiswayeachpersonisprovidedwithacommonbackgroundfromwhichtolearnthenecessaryskillsandattitudesforimprovingfamilylife.
10.2.6Activities
Activity1:Whatisafamily?
Thisactivityisusefulasanicebreakerforthetopic.Procedure:
1.Asktheparticipantstodefinefamily.
2.Leadthediscussionalongthefollowingpoints:
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Doesfamilyonlymeanbloodandlegalrelationship?Whataboutsocialandemotionalrelationships?
Canunrelatedpersonsstayingtogetherbeconsideredafamily?
Estimatedtime:15minutesActivity2:MyfamilynameProcedure:
1.Asktheparticipantstothinkofthemeaningoftheirfamilyname.
2.Eachparticipantexpressesthismeaningwiththelargegroupthroughadrawingoracting.
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3.Eachparticipantsharesthefollowingabouttheirfamilynamewiththeirpartner:
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Whatisthemeaningofthisfamilyname?Whatisthehistoryofthisfamilyname?
Doesthefamilynameindicatetherace/religion/regionofthefamily?Isanystatusattachedtotheirfamilyname?
4.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.
5.Discusstheimportanceofone’sfamilynameforgroup-levelfamilyidentity.Estimatedtime:30minutes
Activity3:Drawingmyfamily-esteemtreeProcedure:
1.Asktheparticipantstomaketheirfamilyself-esteemtreeasfollows:(1)(2)(3)(4)2.3.4.5.
Listfamilystrengthsasroots.Listfamilyactionsasbranches.Listfamilyachievementsasfruits.
Onthetrunk,writewhichfamilythisself-esteemtreebelongsto.
Eachparticipantsharestheirfamilyself-esteemtreewiththelargegroup.Celebrateeveryone’sfamilyself-esteem,aftertheirsharing.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.
Discussioncanfocusonneedforfamilymembers’acceptance,senseofworthandloveforthefamily,confidenceaboutfamily’scapabilities,assertivenesswithreferencetofamilyrights,andfamily-levelself-responsibilityformeetingitsneeds.
Estimatedtime:45minutesActivity4:MyfamilygenogramProcedure:
1.Asktheparticipantstodrawatleastathree-generationalgenogramoftheirfamilyandsharewiththeirpartner:
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Eachhorizontallineconveysageneration,andgenerationsarejoinedbyverticallines.
Theycanstartwiththeirowngeneration,includingself,siblingsandspouses.Theirparents’generationcanbelistedabovetheirown.Theirchildren’sgenerationcanbelistedbelowtheirown.
Drawsquaresformalesandcirclesforfemales,andplacetheageofeachwithin.Acrosswithinindicatesdead.
Listsiblings/childrenfromtheoldesttotheyoungest,lefttoright.Listhusbandontheleftandwifeontheright.
Makeacircletoincludethefamilymembersthatlivetogetherinahousehold.
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2.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.
3.Discussioncanfocusonfamilyhistory,hereditarypatterns,characteristicsandpresentcomposition.Activity5:RespectingpluralityofhouseholdcompositionProcedure:
1.Asktheparticipantstoexaminetheirhouseholdcompositionintheirfamilygenogramandformsixgroupsaccordingtotheirpresenthouseholdcompo-sition:jointhousehold,nuclearhousehold,single-parenthousehold,childlesshousehold,reconstituted/step-familyandconsensualUnion.
2.Eachgroupdiscussesthereasonsandimplicationsoftheirhouseholdtype,andshareswiththelargegroup.
3.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.
4.Thediscussioncanfocusontheimportanceofrespectingpluralityofhouseholdcomposition.EstimatedTime:45minActivity6:FamilyadaptabilityProcedure:
1.Asktheparticipantstoassesstheadaptabilityoftheirfamilyinthefollowingsituations:
Theamountofstress
createdbythesetransitions:high–1,medium–2low–3
Familyadaptability:rigid–1,structured–2flexible–3,chaotic–4
Developmentaltransitions•Whenthereisbirthofachild•Whenthereisamarriageandadditionofafamilymember•Whenthereisachangeintheeducationoroccupationofafamilymember
•Whenthereisdeathinthefamily
2.Participantssharetheassessmentwiththeirpartner.
3.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.
4.Thediscussioncanfocusonhowtoconverttherigidandchaoticadaptabilityintostructuredandflexible.Estimatedtime:20minutes
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Activity7:DrawingfamilytogethernessProcedure:
1.Asktheparticipantstodrawapictureoftheirfamily,asengagedinthemostcommonactivity.
2.Participantslisttheactivitiesthatthefamilymembersdotogether.3.Participantsreflectiftheyenjoydoingthesefamilyactivities.4.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.
5.Discusshowitisimportanttotogetherhaveatleastonemealaday,spendweek-endsandvacationsandcelebratebirthdaysandfestivalsandsoon.Thedecisionsaboutthesealsoneedtobetakentogetherasafamily.Estimatedtime:30minutes
Activity8:StoryoncomplementarityinfamilylifeProcedure:
1.SharethestoryofbrothersSonuandMonu
OncetherelivedtwobrothersSonuandMonu.SonuwasblindwhileMonuwaslame.Hecouldnotwalkwithouthelp.OnedaySonuheardthatalargefairwasbeingheldinthenextvillage.HesaidtoMonu,“Brother,wemustgotothatfair.We”llhavealotoffun.”“ButSonu,howcanwegosofaraway?Youareblindsoyoucan’tseetheway.IamlamesoIcan’twalkforsuchalongdistance.”
Sonusmiledandsaid,“Don’tbedisheartened,Monu,Ihavefoundawayout.IamblindbutIcanwalktocovergreatdistances.Youcannotwalkasyouarelame,butyoucanshowmethewaytothefair.Nowyoucansitonmyshoulders.YouwillseethewayandtellmewhichwaytogowhileI’llbeyourlegstocarryyoutothefair.”Sothetwofriendswenttothefairtogetherandenjoyedthemselves.(AdaptedfromTinyTotBestofMoralStories2002)
2.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.3.Discussionmaybeconductedalongthefollowingpoints:
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HowdidSonuandMonuovercomedifficultiestogethertogotothefair?Complementarityreferstorecognisingdifferentstrengthsofindividualsinteamsandusingthesetoachievethebestpossibleresultsinateameffort.
Estimatedtime:30minutesActivity9:FamilyasateamProcedure:
1.Preparechitswithnamesofdifferentmachineswrittenonthem.Theexamplesareoven,bicycle,trainengine,airplane,pencilsharpener,mixer/grinder,sewingmachine,washingmachineandsoon.
2.Dividetheparticipantsintosmallgroupsandaskeachsmallgroupselectsachitandplantoenactthemachineasagroup.
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3.Eachmemberhasaroletoplayandtheenactmentshowsconnections,move-mentsandsounds.
4.Eachsmallgrouptakesturnsdoingtheenactment,whichtheotherstrytoguess(adaptedfrom“Machines”byStaley1982).
5.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.
6.Discussionmayfocusonapplicationoftheactivitytofamilylifewithreferencetoimportanceofcomplementarity,interdependence,individualaccountability,sharingresources,providingmutualsupportandcelebratingjointsuccess.Estimatedtime:30minutes
Activity10:Problem-solvinginfamilylifeProcedure:
1.Asktheparticipants(notmorethan15)tostandinacircle,closetoeachother,shouldertoshoulder.
2.Participantsrandomlygrabtwootherhandsofpersonsnotstandingnexttothem.Theresultisanawkwardbuthilarioustangle.
3.Theparticipantstrytountanglethemselveswithoutlettinggothehandthattheyareholding.
4.Theyjumpoversomehands,gobeneathsomehands,turnaroundwiththeirhandsgoingoverothers’headsandsoon,tountanglethemselves.
5.Theymayendupwithalargecircleliketheystartedwithorsomesmallinter-connectedcircles.Somemaynotbeabletountanglethemselves(adaptedfrom“AllinKnots”inEnergize1991).
6.Askquestionsforprocessingtheactivityandleadthediscussionforapplicationtoproblem-solvinginfamilylife.Estimatedtime:30minutes
10.3DemocraticFamilyStructure10.3.1FamilyStructure
Familystructurecomprisesofrolesandpower,influencedbyfamilyideologies,functionalorientationandrules.10.3.1.1FamilyIdeologies
Familyideologiesgenerallycompriseofpatriarchy,sexism,adultismandageism.Patriarchydescribesasocialstructurewheretheactionsandideasofmenandboysaredominantoverthoseofwomenandgirls.Thiscircumstanceofmaledominanceisreflectedincorrelativeinequitiesthroughoutthesociety.Inthesphereofthefamily,thefatherortheeldestmaleisconsideredthepatriarchor“headofthehousehold”(Wikipedia2008).Therehasneverbeenatruematriarchalfamilyinexistence.
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10.3.1.2FamilyFunctionalOrientation
McIntyre(1966)identifiedthefollowingthreemajorareasoffamilyfunctions,whichneedtobebalancedforademocraticfamilystructure:
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Thefunctionsofthefamilyfortheethniccommunityandthelargersociety(kinshiporientation);
Thefunctionsofthefamilyforitsunityandjointhappiness(familism)andThefunctionsofthefamilyfordevelopmentandwell-beingofindividualfamilymembers(individualism).
AccordingtoRogersandSebald(1962):
Kinshiporientationisthedegreetowhichafamilyfulfilstheroleexpectationsofthekinshipreferencegroup.Familieshavetraditionallyhadastrongkinshiporientationthatinfluencesfamilynormsandsubordinatesindividualinterest.Familismisthesubordinationofindividualinteresttothoseofthefamilygroup.Individualismistheprimacyofindividualinterest.
10.3.1.3FamilyRules
Familyrulesareformulasornormsforrelationshipsorguidesforconductandinteractionsinthefamilyinordertomaintainfamilyhomeostasis(Hepworthetal.2006).AccordingtoVirginiaSatir,familyrulesareusuallynotconsciouslyknownorverbalisedbythefamilymembers.Thefamilybecomesdysfunctionalwhenmembersdonotunderstandtheunwrittenrules.Usuallysuchfamiliesdonothavebadmembersbutbadrules.Shewouldlikeallfamilymemberstounderstandtherulesthatgoverntheiremotionalinterchanges,includingfreedomtocomment,freedomtoexpresswhatoneisseeingorhearing,freedomtoagreeordisap-proveandfreedomtoaskquestions,whenonedoesnotunderstand(ThompsonandHenderson2007).10.3.1.4FamilyRoles
Thefunctionsthatthefamilyasaninstitutionperformsaredividedamongfamilymembersintheformofroles.Rolesareculturallydefinedandarepassedontosucceedinggenerationsascorrectbehaviour(NyeandBerardo1973).Roleexpec-tationsarethuslearntfromthefamilyoforientation.AccordingtoLevy(1949),roledifferentiationisthedistributionofpersonsamongthevariouspositionsandactivitiesdistinguishedinthestructureandhencethedifferentialarrangementofthemembersofthestructure.Thetermsofroledifferentiationmaybeage,sex,generationandsometimeseconomicandpoliticalpositions.Familyroleshaveimplicationsforlocusofpowerinthefamily.10.3.1.5PowerinFamily
AccordingtoBloodandWolfe(1960),poweristheabilityofanindividualtoinflu-enceorcontrolthebehaviourofothers.Inthecontextofthefamily,powerrefersto
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anactorstatement,whichindicatesanattemptonthepartofafamilymembertocontrol,initiate,changeormodifythebehaviourormotivationofanothermember.Inpatriarchalfamilies,powerrestswiththeoldestmaninthefamily.Theegalitarianfamilyimpliesequaldistributionofpowerbetweenmenandwomenandacrossagegroups.Familypowerhasimplicationforstatusinthefamily.Sincemenandelderlyhavemorepowerinpatriarchalfamilies,theyhaveahigherstatusthanwomenandchildreninthesefamilies.
Powerleadstoabuseofthepowerless.Thetwobasictypesoffamilyabuseareadultabuseandchildabuse.Thefollowingfactorsdifferentiatefamilyabusefromothertypesofabuse:
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Itoccurswithinongoingrelationshipsthatareexpectedtobeprotective,supportiveandnurturing.
Thevictimnotonlywantstoescapetheviolence,butalsolongstobelongtoafamily.
Affectionandattentionmayco-existwithviolenceandabuse.
Ongoingfamilyrelationshipscreateopportunitiesforrepeatedvictimisation(AmericanPsychologicalAssociation1996,citedbyMignonetal.2002).
10.3.1.6DemocraticFamilyStructureDemocraticfamilystructurerequires:
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Egalitarian,gender-aware,child-friendlyandelderlyfriendlyideologiesandrules.
Roleflexibilityandinterchangeability.Egalitarianpowerandstatusallocation.
10.3.2SexismandRightsofWomen
10.3.2.1Sexism
Sexismisaprejudiceordiscriminationonthegroundsofsex,especiallyagainstwomen(Reader’sDigestOxford1993).Itimpliesstereotypesofwomen’sphysicalandmentalcapabilities,whichjustifymalecontroloverwomenwithreferencetotheirlabour,sexualityandreproductiveroles.Feminismintroducedthedistinctionbetweensexandgendertodealwithsexismorthegeneraltendencytoattributewomen’ssubordinationtotheiranatomy.Forages,itwasbelievedthatthedifferentcharacteristics,rolesandstatusaccordedtowomenandmeninsocietyaredeter-minedbybiology(thatissex),thattheyarenaturaland,therefore,notchangeable(AnnOakley1985,citedinBhasin2000).However,peoplearebornwithsexualdifferences,whicharebiologicaldifferences,butaretaughtwhattheappropriatebehaviourandattitudes,rolesandactivitiesareforthem,andhowtheyshouldrelatetootherpeople.Genderreferstothesesocio-culturaldefinitionsofmanandwoman,thewaysocietiesdistinguishbetweenthetwoandassigntothemsocialroles.Throughouttheirlife,parents,teachers,peers,cultureandsocietyreinforce
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this.Thislearnedbehaviouriswhatmakesupgenderidentityanddeterminesgenderroles(Williamsetal.1994).10.3.2.2HumanRightsofWomen
TheUnitedNationsConventionontheEliminationofAllFormsofDiscriminationagainstWomen(CEDAW)definesdiscriminationagainstwomenas“anydiscrim-ination,exclusionorrestrictionmadeonthebasisofsexwhichhastheeffectorpurposeofimpairingornullifyingtherecognition,enjoymentorexercisebywomen,irrespectiveoftheirmaritalstatus,onabasisofequalityofmenandwomen,ofhumanrightsandfundamentalfreedomsinthepolitical,economic,social,cultural,civiloranyotherfield.”
Boysandgirlshavethesamerightsbuttheirproblemsmaydiffer.Agender-sensitiveapproachimpliesunderstandingandconsiderationofthedifferentrealities,needsandinterestsofboysandgirls,andmenandwomen.Suchanapproachtakesintoconsiderationthepowerrelationsbetweenmaleandfemalemembersofthefamilyandthecommunityinordertounderstandhowthesemightinfluencethedecision-makingandthedistributionofworkload,incomeandresourcesinthefamily,communityandsocietyatlarge(UNICEF2001).
10.3.3AdultismandRightsofChild
(RefertoChapters1and2.)
10.3.4AgeismandRightsofElderly
10.3.4.1Ageism
Theolderpersonshavetraditionallycarriedahighstatus;theoldestmanhasgen-erallybeenconsideredtheheadofthefamily.Thetechnologicaladvancementwithindustrialisation,urbanisationandliberalisationhasbeenchangingthesocio-economiccontextofageing.Thefastmovingworldoftechnologyintheliberalisedeconomyvaluesyoungandeducatedprofessionals.Theexperientialwisdomoftheolderpersonisnotconsideredproductiveinthisscenario.Moreover,theconceptofretirementfromworkisleadingtoloweringoftheirstatusasnon-productivedependents.Itistheearningman,whoisnowconsideredtheheadofthefamily.Women,whowerealwayssubordinatetothemeninthefamily,earlierhadauthor-ityoveryoungerwomen.Thetrendsshowinvertingofhierarchiesandambiguityofrolesratherthanamovementtowardsanegalitarianfamilystructure,duetogrowingconsumerism(TataInstituteofSocialSciences1999).
Themarginalisationoftheelderlyisbeingjustifiedbyageism,whichisthehold-ingofprejudicialviewsaboutindividualsorgroupsbasedontheirage(Marshall1994).Ageismleadstodislikeofoldpeoplebasedonthebeliefthatoldagecausestheolderpersonstobeunattractive,unintelligent,asexual,unemployableandsenile(Comfort1976,citedinCockerham1991).Itassumesthattheolderpersonshavereducedphysicalandintellectualcapabilitiesandare,therefore,dependentonthe
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youngerpopulation.Thisisgenerallynottrueattheageof60,justbecauseitisgenerallytheageofretirementfromformalwork.Theyoung-old(61–75)arepro-ductivehumanresources,asseenintheinformalsector,andtheold-old(76–90)arecapableofbeingusefultothesocietyandarenotdependentliabilities.Thenon-productiveveryold(91+),thedisabledandtheterminallyill;thelandlessandmigrant;andthesingleolderpersonsincities,wherecommunitysupportsareweak,aremorelikelytobeneglected,abusedandrendereddestitute(TataInstituteofSocialSciences1999).
10.3.4.2HumanRightsofOlderPersons
TheUnitedNations18Principlesfortherightsoftheolderpersonsfallunderthefiveclustersof:
Independence(accesstobasicservicesandcare,opportunitiestoworkormakeincome,accesstoeducation,safelivingenvironments);
Participation(toformassociationsormovementsofolderpersons);
Care(accesstofamily,communityandinstitutionalcare,health,socialandlegalservices);
Self-fulfilment(haveopportunitiesfordevelopmentofpotentialandaccesstoeducational,cultural,spiritualandrecreationalresourcesofsociety)andDignity(topreventexploitation,physicalormentalabuse)(Atal2001).Thereisaneedtoacceptoldageasadevelopmentalstageandnotaproblemoradisease,andolderpersonsashumanresourcesandnotliabilities.Coordinatedapproachesarenecessarytoensurethatthefollowingneedsofolderpersonsaremetashumanrights:self-fulfilment,healthandnutrition;workandfinancialsecurity;propertyandhousing;adulteducation;recreationandmobility;familyandcommu-nityawarenessandinteraction,protectionfromneglect,violenceanddestitution;anddeathwithdignity.
10.3.5DemocraticFamilyDecision-Making
Democraticdecision-makingistheaffirmationofeachfamilymember’sdignity,worthandwelfare.Allthemembersshouldbeencouragedtoparticipateinthefamilydiscussion,nomatterhowdifferenttheircontributionsmightbe.Allthemembers,inturn,havearesponsibilitytocontributetheirbestforthebettermentofthegroupfunctioning.Itisimportanttositinacircletoassurethat.Whengen-uinerespectisreceivedfromothers,eachpersonfeelscomfortableinrevealinghisorherideas,confidentthatnoonewillridiculeorcondemnthem(KhavariandKhavari19).
Infamilydecision-making,eachmembershouldavoidbecomingattachedtohisorherownideasorpreferences.Onceexpressed,theideanolongerbelongstoanindividual,butbecomesthepropertyofthefamily,whichmeansthatthecontributor
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canthenlookattheideajustasobjectivelyastheothermembers.Thisleavesthefamilyfreetoacceptorrejecttheideawithoutfearofhurtingthefeelingsoftheonewhosuggestedit.Evenifasolutionisnotfinallyadoptedasasolutionorplan,theonewhooffereditretainsdignityandasenseofworthifgivenarespectfulandcourteoushearing.Allmembersshouldfullyunderstandthatrejectionofanideaisnotarejectionofitsoriginator(KhavariandKhavari19).Followingarethestepsfordemocraticdecision-making:1.Thefamilymembersshouldberelaxedandseatedinacircleforthedecision-making.
2.Everymembershouldsharewhattheproblemisfromtheirpointofviewandlistentooneanother,withtheintenttounderstand.
3.Explorethefactsfirst,withreferencetowho,where,when,whyandhow.
4.Discussfeelings,opinionsandperceptionsattachedtothesefactsandthencarryoutitsanalysis.
5.Carryoutabrainstormingofsuggestionsforactionwithoutevaluatingthem.Sometimesoneideainspiresamembertothinkofawaytomakeitworkbetter,followedbyevenabetterideafromsomeoneelse,creatinggroupsynergy.
6.Discussthesuggestionswithreferencetocriteriasuchasthefollowing:
rr
theresources/capacitythatthefamilyhastoimplementeach,and
theadvantagesanddisadvantagesthateachmayleadtowithreferencetothefamilyanditsmembers.
7.Createasolutionthatwouldsatisfyallthemembersandmeettheabovecriteria.
8.Allocaterolestoimplementthedecisiontakenbutmakeajointcommitmentandtakejointresponsibilityforitsconsequences.
9.Monitortheconsequencesofimplementationofthedecisionanddecideifthereisaneedtochangeit.
10.Itisokaytomakemistakesindecision-makingandlearnfromthem.
10.3.6Activities
10.3.6.1Activity11:Self-DisclosureofGenderExperiencesProcedure:
1.Askeachparticipant,individually,tocompletethefollowingsentence:
“SometimesI’mgladI’magirl/boybecause...”.Askthemtolistasmanyoftheadvantagesofbeingagirl/boyastheycan.
2.Thenaskeachparticipanttocompletethefollowingsentence:“SometimesIwishIwereagirl/boybecause...”.Againtheyshouldlistasmanyreasonsaspossible.
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3.Allowalltheparticipantstosharetheirviewsanddiscussthestereotypesthatcomeupinthesharingsession.
4.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity
(Source:“Stereotypes:Selfdisclosure”inWilliamsetal.1994,pp.127–128).Estimatedtime:30–45minutes
Activity12:AwarenessofsexisminproverbsProcedure:
1.Asktheparticipantstolistthecommonsexistproverbsongirlsandboysormenandwomenandputupontheboard(forexamplegirls/womencanneverkeepasecret...sotheyshouldbekeptoutofconfidentialfamilymatters).
2.Theparticipantsidentifytheassumptionsofphysicalandmentalcapabilitiesofmenandwomen.
3.Theparticipantsexaminereasonsfortheseassumptions.4.Discusscounterevidence.Estimatedtime:30–45minutes
Activity13:AssessmentoffamilyrolesandpowerProcedure:
1.Askeachparticipanttofillupthefollowingchartforassessmentoffamilyrolesandpowerandsharewiththeirpartner.
No.12345678
FamilyactivityCooking
LookingafterthesickandtheoldShoppingHousecleaning
HelpingchildrenwithstudiesWorkingtoearnSavingsandinvestmentDecisionaboutcareer/marriages
Role:
Whocarriesitout?Power:
Whohasthefinalsay?
2.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.Estimatedtime:45minutesActivity14:GenderquizProcedure:
10.3DemocraticFamilyStructure205
1.Handoutthefollowinggenderquiztoeachparticipantandaskthemtowrite“Agree”,“Disagree”or“Undecided”againsteachofthefollowingstatements:
No.123456710111213
Genderstatement
GirlsarebornphysicallyweakerthanboysareBybirth,girlsarebetterattakingcareofchildrenandcookingthanboysareBoysarebetteratmathematicsthangirlsareandgirlsarebetteratlanguagesthanboysareGirlsmustgetmarriedafterschool,butboysmaystudyfurtherGirlsmustchoosebetweenacareerandafamilyAmarriagesucceedsonlyifthegirlislesseducatedthantheboyisTobeagoodwifeandmother,agirlmustmarryatanearlyageAwomanbecomescompleteonlywhenshebecomesamotherSinglewomencannotraisetheirchildrenwellWhenagirl/womanisrapedsheisresponsibleforitOnlymencontributetothecountry’seconomyAwoman’sworkislessstrenuousthanaman’sworkMenaremoresincereaboutworkthanwomenareaswomentendtobepreoccupiedwithhouseholdmattersWhenwomenworkoutsidetheirhome,theytendtoneglectandbreaktheirfamilyWomenmakebaddrivers
Womenkeepongossipingabouteachother
Agree–1Disagree–2Undecided–3
141516
2.Avolunteercompilestheresponsesandpreparestheaggregatescores.
3.Discussagreementsanddisagreementsalongwithreasonsforgenderrolesandstereotypesandcounterevidence.Estimatedtime:45minutes
Activity15:UnderstandingadultismProcedure:
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1.Asktheparticipantstoreflectonwhethertheywere/aretoldthefollowingintheirchildhood/nowandhowtheyfelt/feelaboutit:
rrrrrr
Youareonlyachild.
Youwillknowwhenyougrowup.Stopactinglikeachildandgrowup.Weknowwhatisgoodforyou.Youneednotknowthisnow.
Youwillnotdecidewithoutaskingus.
2.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.Estimatedtime:15minutes
Activity16:UnderstandingchildrightsProcedure
1.Formfourgroupstodiscussthefollowingcategoriesofchildrights:
rrrrrrr
ChildrighttofamilycareChildrighttodevelopmentChildrighttoparticipationChildrighttoprotection
2.Thegroupsdiscussthefollowingquestionsoneachofthesecategoriesandthensharewiththelargegroup:
Whatdoesthisrightinclude?
Whenandwhyaretheserightsnotachievedinourfamilies?Howcantheserightsbeachievedinourfamilies?
3.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.Estimatedtime:30–45minutes
Activity17:ExerciseonimagesoftheolderpersonsProcedure:
1.Identifyproverbsonolderpersonsandputupthislistontheboard.AlternatelydistributethefollowingElderlyQuiztoelicittheparticipants’opinionregardingthestereotypesoftheolderpersons.Participantswrite“Agree”or“Disagree”againsteachofthefollowingstatements
2.Participantsidentifytheassumptionsfortheabovestereotypesandimagesoftheolderpersons,theirreasonsanddiscusscounterevidence.
3.Discussionmaybeconductedwiththefollowingargumentsfortheabovestatements:
1.Mostoftheolderpersonsindevelopingnationsworkintheunorganisedsectorwherethereisnoretirement.Mostofthemworkuntiltheydie.
10.3DemocraticFamilyStructure207
No.1234567101112
Statement
Olderpersonscannotdoanyproductivework
Olderpersonsareconservative,inflexibleandresistanttochangeOlderpersonshavecompletedenjoyinglife
OlderpersonsmustgiveupworldlycomfortsandbecomereligiousOlderpersonsmustgetinvolvedinsocialworkafterretirementOlderpersonsmustspendtheirtimetakingcareoftheirgrandchildrenOlderpersonsspoiltheirgrandchildrenOlderpersonsareaburdentothefamilyOlderpersonsdonotcontributetosociety
Olderpersonsareincapableofcreativity,ofmakingprogress,ofstartingafreshOlderpersonsmustdressinadrab/sobermannerOlderpersonsmuststayonlywithpeopleoftheirownage
Agree–1Disagree–2
2.Olderpersonsfindalotofsenseinthewaytheyhavelivedtheirownlife,asithasbeenfunctionalforthem.
3.Righttoenjoylifecontinuesthroughthelifespan.
4.Atallages,humanbeingspreferworldlycomforts.Religiousorientationcancomeatanyage.
5.Itishealthytokeeponeselfoccupiedwithgoodworkafterretirementfromafulltimejob.
6.Olderpersonsareveryfondoftheirgrandchildrenbuttheymayhaveotherintereststoo.
7.Olderpersonstendtopampergrandchildrenandsodoparents.Actually,grandparentsaregoodbuffersbetweenparentsandtheirchildren.
8.Olderpersonsaresourcesofexperientialwisdomandsoanassettothesociety.
9.Olderpersonshavealreadycontributedtothesocietyformanyyears.
10.Creativityandmakingprogressarenotrelatedtoage,thoughstartingafresh
maybedifficultinoldage.
11.Ageisnotadeterminingfactorforhowoneshoulddressup.
12.Societyismadeupofpeopleindifferentagegroupsandthatisthenatural
socialmix.Segregationisnotgoodbyageoranyotherfactor.Estimatedtime:45minutes
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Activity18:SmallgroupdiscussiononawarenessaboutissuesandrightsoftheolderpersonsProcedure:
1.Formsmallgroupsofparticipantsandallotissuesofelderlyfordiscussionsuchasnegativeattitudeoftheyounggeneration,sendingthemtooldagehomes,physicaldisabilities,financialdependence,familyabuse,vulnerabilitytorobberyandmurder,andsoon.
2.Askthesmallgroupstodiscusstheseissueswithreferencetotherightsoftheolderpersonsofindependence,participation,care,self-fulfilmentanddignityandpresenttothelargegroup.
3.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.Estimatedtime:30minutes
Activity19:Role-playfordemocraticfamilydecision-makingProcedure:
1.Formsmallgroupsofparticipantsandalloteachsmallgroupdifferentsitua-tionsthatarepertinenttotheirdailyfamilylifeexperiences.Examplesofsuchsituationsare:(1)(2)(3)(4)(5)(6)(7)
GrandmothercomingtostayinanuclearfamilyPlanningafamilyvacation
BudgetingofthebonusincomeforthefamilyPlanningforasister’sweddingPlanningforadaughter’scareerSelectionofanewhouse
Impendingtransferofoneofthespouses
2.Thesmallgroupscanpreparerole-playsondemocraticdecision-makinginthesesituations,andpresenttothelargegroup.
3.Askquestionsandleaddiscussionforprocessingtheactivity.Estimatedtime:30–45minutes
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Carter,B.andMcGoldrick,M.(Eds.).(2005).TheExpandedFamilyLifeCycle:Individual,FamilyandSocialPerspectives(3rded.).NewYork,NY:Pearson.
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